I thought this was a Ouija post, and I was already trying to figure out how to get enough people to spell OnlyFans.
To be the very best, like no one ever was
Generate taxes
deleted by creator
extrapolating from existing lemmy users, your destiny is likely to use linux, hate AI, and take estrogen
You fetch butter.
Sometime tomorrow, you’re going to take a shit. If you are lucky, ot won’t be in your pants.
Do a barrel roll
You will find love in a small, hidden away black site in Liberia. Your eyes will meet across the water-boarding room and it will be love at first sight.
Then your love will betray you because they were actually an undercover Russian spy and you fell for it! They pumped you for secrets for years! You’ll then find your self on the run from hit squads in Bucharest but you’ll escape because of your training and dedication to regime change in the search for oil.
Finally, on your deathbed, surrounded by children and grandchildren, you’ll notice that the hospice nurse is your old flame, the Russian spy. She injects your IV with cyanide and you die painfully because you let your guard down AGAIN!
Drink plenty of water. Have a balanced diet. Have a regular sleep schedule. Stretch every day, ideally by doing yoga. Exercise regularly. Practice mindful meditation. Learn to cook. Learn to sew. Read books. Develop skills.
Knowledge is power; be dangerous.
Diahrrea, and a lot of it. Don’t eat at that restaurant this weekend
Be gay, do crime
Uh let’s see…it says here…uh, cantaloupe? Good luck deciphering that one I guess, buddy
It’s crab sorry
