My partner is the worst for this. She’s out there killing it and everyone says she’s doing great, and then she’s like “Oh, I’m just learning still, I don’t think I want the promotion they’re pushing on me yet”. Come on, just acknowledge that you know a lot more than you give yourself credit for and other people see it.
0/10 do not recommend, cried for weeks while hiding under my blanket. The main issue was that I tried to do a good job, but I was just not able to perform in this position.
The happy ending, or at least a happy midterm goal, was that I switched lanes and now perform better in a different job. But taking every promotion that is offered to you can be an error.
Honestly I think the main problem is that when something comes easy to you it’s easy to assume it came easy to everyone else and you’re not special. Happened to me on a few subjects and I got knocked out of that thought process when I acted like a dick about others not getting it and had it spelled out for me.
Things come easy to me, but I don’t derive an entitlement to a higher salary from that vs. my colleagues who have to work harder to accomplish less. I do derive an entitlement to negotiate harder vs. my employer though, and sometimes leverage my usefulness to speak up about issues that other colleaguea are afraid to complain about.
Yeah, it took me a long long time of working, promotions, a lot of interviewing job candidates from big schools and big companies, and working different jobs to really get where I fit in the skill hierarchy and feel confident.
My partner is the worst for this. She’s out there killing it and everyone says she’s doing great, and then she’s like “Oh, I’m just learning still, I don’t think I want the promotion they’re pushing on me yet”. Come on, just acknowledge that you know a lot more than you give yourself credit for and other people see it.
I was in the sameish boat, meaning I’m still an imposter, but I took one promotion too much. And it burnt me like crazy.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peter_principle
0/10 do not recommend, cried for weeks while hiding under my blanket. The main issue was that I tried to do a good job, but I was just not able to perform in this position.
The happy ending, or at least a happy midterm goal, was that I switched lanes and now perform better in a different job. But taking every promotion that is offered to you can be an error.
Honestly I think the main problem is that when something comes easy to you it’s easy to assume it came easy to everyone else and you’re not special. Happened to me on a few subjects and I got knocked out of that thought process when I acted like a dick about others not getting it and had it spelled out for me.
Things come easy to me, but I don’t derive an entitlement to a higher salary from that vs. my colleagues who have to work harder to accomplish less. I do derive an entitlement to negotiate harder vs. my employer though, and sometimes leverage my usefulness to speak up about issues that other colleaguea are afraid to complain about.
Imagine how much more could change for the better if you had a union
Yeah, it took me a long long time of working, promotions, a lot of interviewing job candidates from big schools and big companies, and working different jobs to really get where I fit in the skill hierarchy and feel confident.
Remind her that experts are more aware of what they don’t know. So, she has already subconsciously labeled herself an expert.
Yeah, I remind her of this, and that she’s just not confident at selling herself, and that’s okay.
And everyone does it.
I have a master’s and years of experience. Every day I say something like, “one of these days, I’ll learn how to do my job.”
Life-long learning is a goal with no end destination.
Ask her if she is even good enough to have imposter syndrome?
I eventually got over that. I feel incompetent pretty often but I doubled my salary in 4 years.